When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Randomize
