I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You were trust falling into bushes
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
