I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Randomize
