Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
