I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
