Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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