have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
