I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
