Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
