He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
