Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
