What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
