I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
