the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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