i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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