Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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