i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
