So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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