No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize