For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
