im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
