They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
