hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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