absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
