Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(806): View more from Texas

my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.

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(970): View more from Colorado

The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.

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(905): View more from Toronto

No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags

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(503): View more from Oregon

He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning

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(254): View more from Texas

Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out

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(504): View more from Louisiana

ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.

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(518): View more from New York

Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.

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(253): View more from Washington

Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival

(360): View more from Washington

How about beer and nachos?

(253): View more from Washington

A fine substitute!

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