It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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