I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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