I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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