I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
