who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
