Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
