i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
