I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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