Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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