we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
