His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
