just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
