he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize