Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize