This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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