So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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