I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
