tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
