some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
