Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
