we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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