okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
