I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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