Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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