I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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