but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
