so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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